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@LoveKaruna (Twitter)

India Journal Snippets (Part 2)

New Delhi to Kolkata

(Part 1 begins on October 7th)

April 13th, 2006

I think that's the right date. I can't sleep and I don't know why. Too many things racing through my head. My body is so uncomfortable from being all tight on the plane. I think I got about 2 hours last night It is now 6:30 a.m. The sun is completely out. Maybe if I have some time I will sleep again, but I really should get out of here by 10 a.m. I don't want the sun to be blazing when I am searching for the train station. I think it is about time I made clear my intention for this trip. I, Karuna Sian Sagara, want to obtain life experience, a higher and deeper understanding of myself and I want to learn true compassion. I know I have things to offer this world, things that come from the heart, but I just need to find a skill so I can apply it and manifest it. Reminds me a bit of Sri Lanka here. Different smells, different music and different languages though. I can feel how much bigger it is here too. Haha, I can hear cows mooing in the streets outside my room. It seems pretty quiet outside other than that. BREAK. At the train station, inside the tourist reservation place. I need to get food soon or I will faint. I am so worried that this train will be full I need to get a train right away. I am also upset because the hotel charged me an extra 75 rupees for some luxury fee. Okay whatever, it's not a big deal. I am just really exhausted. I hope I can see a clerk soon. BREAK. So I booked my ticket. I leave here at 4:45 p.m. I think the ride is 18 hrs. I have no idea if I got a sleeper or not. I hope I do. Now I just ate some food from a vegetarian place across from the train station. I wonder what it will do in my stomach. I am afraid of getting sick. My ride will be horrendous if I do. I already feel a little hot. Maybe because it's 38 degrees outside! I think I will sit here for a minute to see how I feel and then walk over to the station and wait til I have to leave. BREAK. I am on the train. God, I almost missed my train. There thankfully just happened to be a young lady sitting next to me on the bench who took a glance at my ticket when I opened it 10 minutes before my train departed. Thank God I checked my ticket and thank the Lord that lady was watching. But all is good now. I am on the train. They have already served a snack, which I thought was dinner, but some guy asked me what I wanted for dinner so I guess I'm eating again. My oh my I'm full already. This is better than being hungry. BREAK. It is quite chilly with the A/C, but I've got this nice heavy blanket to keep me warm. These people that I am bunking with are very friendly, although I'm not surprised considering that every person that I've talk to here has been king and eager to help me. Hmm, I can't help but wonder how Canadians are to foreigners when they need help. How much did I spend on this train? About $50 CAD I think. It's really worth the comfort I think. I am getting a full breakfast as well and I can lie down and lock my bag without worries. Mom I miss you. I think it's going to take a few days to get adjusted into the culture here. Maybe I've just been too tired to deal with people. Sri Lanka wasn't very different from here, but I think I've already readjusted back into Canadian culture. It's funny how that happens so fast.

April 14th, 2006

Finally I got a decent sleep. Happy Good Friday everybody. I'm excited to be meeting Michael and his wife in a few hours. I really hope that there is a strong connection and we teach each other love like it said in my tarot reading. I still have not found a stone that I can meditate with. Maybe I can use the stones I have. They are meant for clearing the mind. So it is not my third day in India. I have spent most of the time I've been here finding ways to travel or traveling. I still haven't seen much. When I look out the window of the train for too long I get dizzy so I try and avoid that. My mom only wants me to stay at her house for a week when I get back so I think I will stay at Cass' house for the month of July until I find a job and a place to live. I guess there's no sense in worrying about that now. I hope that I can learn a lot from this trip and being on my own. I still haven't learned how to fully take care of myself. I rely on my mom and other's help way too much. I'm going to be 21 this year. Yay! Breakfast is being served shortly. This woman in the berth below me is Muslim and has a bunch of books about the Quran. She has some books by this author Harun Yahya. He is  white man who teaches the importance of the Quran. I remember Raul told me to get my hands on one of his books. Now I can't help but wonder what happened to Raul. I also wonder which people are pushed back in my memory. I wonder which people I used to think about all the time that I can't even remember right now. I think being on my own has inspired me to write a lot more. I only have this journal to share my thoughts with. BREAK. Aha! See, I knew that once I had someone to talk to I wouldn't be writing as much. I am at Michael and Himani's home, which is quite beautiful. I had a nice lunch with them, talked with Michael a bit and then took a nice 4 hour nap. Then me and Michael went for a walk to pick up a few things for dinner and some sweets for New Year tomorrow. We ate pasta tonight. When Himani came home from visiting with a friend we all talked about the situation in India and more specifically Kolkata. I learned that there is a communist government here and recently they've banned any campaigning kinds of things. So I don't think I would have known that there was an election happening now if they hadn't told me. I am really learning a lot from talking to Michael and Himani. I am very happy and grateful that I am able to stay here. I think I will read now and go to bed.

@LoveKaruna (Twitter)

India Journal Snippets (Part 1)

My Journal

April 11th, 2006

Sitting here in the food court at the airport with my mom and a headache. Feeling less nervous, thank God. I am ready to go. I feel bad for making my mom pay for all of my last minute things. She has already done so much. BREAK. Now I am at the gate B11 waiting for my flight. I'm alone, but these two Indian women sat right next to me. They are probably flying to India with me. I do wonder what this woman thinks of me because she keeps looking at me like she's trying to figure out why I'm getting on this plane. Anyway, I can't believe I'm going to India! It's still the first step, I mean I'm still in Toronto, but I am alone and on my way. I feel safe and like this is what I'm meant to do. I just don't know why...yet. BREAK. Okay so I am on the plane. We left about 2 hours late, but I guess that's not so bad. The man next to me told me that the flight is almost 16 hours. I guess we'll see after. I feel sick. I am so fucking hungry! I just want them to serve some dinner. I wonder what it will be. Then I'm brushing my teeth and going to sleep. BREAK. So there is only about 4 more hours until we reach Delhi. I have eaten a few Indian meals on the plane. They were quite good. It will be so late once we arrive in India so I think I will stay in the airport for the night. I am so uncomfortable in this plane. It hurts all over my body. I can't wait to lie down in an actual bed.

April 12th, 2006

I am in my hotel room, lying down finally on a bed. It is almost 1 a.m. here. The man sitting next to me on the plane just so happened to be a God-sent angel. He has been so helpful to me. On the plane he offered to drop me off at an affordable hotel that is very close to the train station. I could never thank him enough for getting me here. He payed for the taxi, which was probably out of his way and made sure I got to my room safe and sound. He gave me his contact number in India in case I ever need anything. He has even offered to allow me to stay at his house if I ever go to California. He is absolutely incredible. I am so blessed and grateful for it. I really need to get some sleep so that I can get my travels to Calcutta in order. Bon soir.

@LoveKaruna (Twitter)